Two years before the general public saw the Zapruder film, a covert operative is secreted through the back entrance of the New Orleans District Attorney’s office in a nondescript sedan. Accompanied by unidentified FBI agents, the spy is whisked through the garage, up an elevator and straight into the office of Big Jim Garrison himself, the only DA in America to ever try a case in the assassination of President John Fitzgerald Kennedy. The lights dim and a grainy 8mm film flickers through the darkness onto a screen. The ghastly murder of our 35th President unfolds in silence and the small retinue of viewers solemnly takes in the gruesome images.

The lights return and Jim Garrison presses his case to the captive audience. In Big Jim’s mind, the film proves once and for all that Lee Harvey Oswald could not have fired the fatal shots that felled our President, indicating a second shooter and therefore proving a conspiracy. This theory would be debated for decades to come, but at least one attendee of that afternoon’s screening was convinced of a conspiracy: the mysterious secret agent. In his memoirs, the spy would later write:

“I am not at liberty to disclose what I saw but it left no doubt in my mind that it was not Oswald who fired the fatal shot. Garrison’s assertion is that Oswald was not acting alone but as part of a CIA conspiracy.”

The spy was of course James Bond, code-named 007. The legendary secret agent was in New Orleans under one of his many aliases, this time as English actor Roger Moore, who would later be Knighted by Queen Elizabeth for his service to the crown as a member of Her Majesty’s Secret Service. An expert in assassination and black ops, Mr. Bond’s opinion in this matter should be held in great esteem, making him one of many high-profile figures in the intelligence community who knew there was more to the Kennedy assassination than meets the eye.

International news agency’s reported the death of one Sir Roger Moore at the age of 89 yesterday morning, bringing many to conclude that after half a century of service, time has done to Agent 007 what his many enemies failed to. However, other sources assert that 007 is alive and well and that James Bond will return.